In pursuit of becoming more and more freely who I am; the process of a lifetime, as we must deprogram ourselves from “everything that we have been told to be and that we are not,” my psychologist would say.
We are born with a brain, governed by hormones, which moves a body within a family, which is rooted in a society, a country, a very specific hemisphere. All added up to previous events, intergenerational trauma and chance; we are thus caught in a large chain of causes and effects within which we have the freedom to choose, or not, to make a third coffee in the morning – or to try to answer question 1.
My father always told me: “The Chabots, we are hard workers! » Coming from a hyperactive 60-year-old heart transplant recipient who still works 70 hours a week, the bar is high. When I want to complain about my fatigue, I think of him and reassure myself. A little vitamin C, a third coffee, and presto! we left again.
Alejandro Jodorowsky. Through directing actors, he realized that certain characters could have an effect on the performer – a healing effect. Alongside his work as a director, he developed psychomagic therapy. The idea is to offer his patients theatrical acts, close to the initiation rite, to heal in real life. I like the idea of creating a ceremonial, a symbolic gesture to walk. Until recently, he read tarot and prescribed psychomagic acts in a Paris café… His book Mu, the master and the magiciennes continues to inspire me.
A child.
Performance anxiety. Because of a lack of confidence, I was my own enemy. I often harmed myself. It took me a long time to internalize the notion of “being enough.” I felt sick before my acting lessons in the first year of the Conservatory, to name just that. Since childhood, I have been a magic bag girl. To overcome this demon, Jodorowsky would surely suggest that I walk across town, flaming naked, shouting: “This is who I am! “. To meditate.
The horizon. When you look at it, the future becomes clear. I could spend hours looking at the sea, the river, a river. My favorite part of traveling is finding a waterhole and fixing my eyes on its junction with the sky. Everything becomes clearer, or a little less blurry.
Indignation is my driving force. She pushes me to write, above all. I’m often gnawing on a bone. These days I’m angry because my neighbor across the street is paying $1,075 a month for a three and a half in a semi-basement – cockroaches included – in which she keeps her three grandchildren, five days a week. week. That makes me angry!
When future performers take a scene from one of my plays for their theater school entrance auditions. Knowing that their dream is based on my words, my dialogues, moves me to the highest degree. In the field of love is often chosen, love is a philosophical subject, therefore tailor-made for young actors in search of the absolute.
An accidental death, without suffering. My deepest fear would be having to plan the date and time. In the play Table rase, in which I played, the characters accompany a friend in death. At each performance, I cried my eyes out… and not only because it was part of the production. The idea of death terrifies me, but above all, it invades me with an acute feeling of nostalgia, of regret. But as one of the characters says: “What hurts the most is the awareness of your life, but when you’re dead, you’re dead. »
…if I rely on the news these days, it is impossible for me to believe it.
